Stress On Families In Today’s Society: Handling Family Stress

Never before has society put so much stress on the family structure.  The stress of taking care of a family, preparing and planning on meals, bathing, homework, and caring for children are taking a toll on today’s parents.  Add that to the emotional stress that is there between a parent and child, which is a normal part of growing up.  The child may be having a hard time breaking away and the parent a hard time letting go.  When you throw in the extra problem of a special needs child or caring for an elderly parent and you have the potential for severe trouble.

Expectations are high on both parents and children.  Parents feel pressured to provide the lifestyle they think is best for the child.  That may mean working more hours a week and spending less time with family.  Children may expect too much from their parents.  Peer pressure to have the latest electronic accessory and designer clothes may push parents into working many more hours than they are comfortable with.

Parents may have high expectations for the children.  They expect them to get good grades, excel in sports, and get accepted by the best colleges.  A parent may put pressure on their children to take part in their favorite sport or attend their alma mater.

All of these expectations can lead to weakening of the family unit.  Parents who work more hours become stressed because they realize they are leaving their child alone too long.  The child may resent the parent for never being home when the parent is striving to give them the best things in life.

What is the best way to handle family stress?  First, slow down and get your priorities straight.  This means both parents and children.  We can expect too much from our kids and they in turn can be stress and frustrated because of unrealistic goals set by parents.  You may be a CPA and a mat wizard; your child may not “get” the theory of algebra.  They may have talents in other areas.  Give one another a little slack to help reduce tension in the home.  Parents who want their kids to go to the same college as they did can be causing undue stress.  The college may be farther from home and cost more money.  Those two items can increase the stress for parents to provide the funding for the school, and the child who will be expected to live up to the standards their parents set.

Finances are the most potentially damaging item to today’s family.  The urge to spend more, give all they can, and provide their children the things they were not able to have may put too much stress on a parent.  They may increase their workload, work more hours, and be too exhausted to be a part of the child’s life.

Let’s get a balance between needs and wants.  We may want the latest most high-tech laptop computer for our college kid, but if the truth were known, a less expensive model would work just as well.

Your child may want the latest Tommy Hilfiger jeans and the newest and best in sports shoes.  Can a compromise be reached?  Maybe a parent can contribute what a regular pair of jeans would cost and the teenager make up the difference with money earned from a job.

Work together, communicate with each other and work on ways to reduce stress in your family.